Each of us has to face different people in his life. After talking with some personalities, there is some kind of sediment and I want to never talk to them again.
But why are bad people attracted to us? Maybe the problem lies in us? First of all, of course, bad people themselves are to blame for what they are, but we are also to blame for the fact that they are drawn to us. Perhaps you are doing something that attracts them ... From this collection you will find out what it can be.
10. You do not value yourself enough
If you are not very confident in yourself and do not value yourself, you are ready to justify the people around you (especially those who you like), then bad people can attract you. Why?
The answer is simple. It’s not difficult to get into your “field”, but they are always drawn to cute, flexible and polite people, because it’s very convenient with such people.
When you do not value yourself, they can use your kindness and compassion. Then do not be surprised that you will not receive the same attitude in return.
9. Your excessive politeness
Liars and manipulators adore polite and kind people. If you give away your best qualities right and left: compassion, understanding and love, that is, there is a risk that everything around you will “curl” in a row, including bad people.
It is difficult to become tougher when by nature you are a kind person, but you will have to do this so that others understand that you will not babysit with them and approve of any of their behavior.
8. Trying to maintain a relationship, no matter what
If you are the person who silently closes his eyes to all the pranks of his beloved person or friend, then there is a risk that this will someday end. And this will most likely happen not by your will, but the toxic person himself will get tired of manipulating you and humiliating you.
Manipulators and toxic people love to be “under the wing” of that person who endures everything, forgives and is ready to give in. If at once a person did not see the borders, then then it is unlikely to see them. The only thing left is to break the relationship.
7. Know how to listen to the interlocutor
Listening is a good quality that people in others value. However, there is a very fine line between listening to a person really about what is important to him, giving him the opportunity to speak out, and when a person spills all his negativity on you: gossip about others, complaints about how badly he lives.
Bad people are always happy to have relationships with someone who is ready to listen and “absorb” all their information. You must understand that by listening to everyone in a row about everything, you keep negative information in yourself, and you don't need it.
6. Excessive compassion
People who destroy the lives of others, and even their own, are not able to sympathize and empathize, but are very willing to communicate with those who know how to do it.
If you worry about others, try to help at every opportunity, the chance that toxic people "stick" to you is very high.
They just love to be in the role of a victim, listen to words of support, they like your compassion, they willingly use it. You pay attention to bad people, and this is exactly what they expect.
5. Do not know how to set boundaries
There are people who are used to giving: their time, care, attention, acquired knowledge and kindness to others ... They are reluctant to take, but give their own. If this is about you, then most likely you are used to thinking more about others than about yourself. And sometimes even "hands do not reach."
Your desire to give can attract bad people who love to take, and in return give nothing. If you begin to devote more time to yourself and think about your needs, then a toxic person may even be offended.
4. The habit of thinking well about everyone
Thinking about others is good - at first glance, this is a positive feature. But if you think about it ... positive for whom? People cannot be only good or bad, each of us has light and dark.
If you see only good in every person you meet, you run the risk of running into bad people who are happy to "hide" under your wing and will use your kindness, understanding and help.
If you deny the facts about people and justify them, then you will do bad things not only to yourself, but also to these people.
3. You do not believe in true love
A person who believes in love will attract bright and good people. Toxic people will not get close to this.
But if you are disappointed in love, have a negative attitude to its manifestations, and people’s emotions are considered to be their own “markup,” then it is possible that bad people will seek to communicate with you.
People who do not know how to love, cause harm and pain to others, will only be glad to join their ranks of the same "unfortunate" and disappointed.
2. You give hope to negative people
You are a bright and kind person, and live as you want. You are not trying to be like someone or copy the lives of others, you are not envious of anyone. It's fine! But only if you know how to choose your environment.
After all, there are many bad people, and your confidence, life by its own rules will be an example for them (secretly from you). Toxic people will cling to you, your good heart and the life you lead, because your very presence in their life will already cause them to hope for a change.
1. You try to change a person
You have to learn one rule - people do not change, but they can “drown out” some traits in themselves. If you think that your duty is to take care of your neighbor, do not forget that your efforts may be in vain.
For example, you have a friend who takes club drugs or often drinks alcohol, to help her is a very noble desire, however your words of support, participation in the life of your friend will simply make her more confident and calm, but it is unlikely to change while she does will not want and will not decide. And it will gradually destroy your life with its mere presence.